I'm still here!
Note: This entry is a little serious... and can be boring.
It is the result of a lot soul searching.... a soul searching session which was not planned.. it was more of a mood...
I dont know where to start this. I've been feeling strange stuff these days; in a strange mood... nothing seems normal..... I have deadlines, yet i feel no guilt wasting away three days hogging away and staring at TV..... There's responsibility, yet theres these thoughts of letting go! What's up with me?!!!
where am I? what am i gonna do? what are my plans? what I want to do with my life?!?!
what is the purpose of my life.
I know I am not making any sense..... well, thats exactly the case!!!
My mood is more or less representative of the songs that I have in my MP3 player right now (yes yes... stupid iPod ppl, i have only 128 mb!! screw u!!! :) )
this blog entry was written over a span of few hours.. not in one complete sitting
(*listening to Coldplay-Yellow) I do know that there is something that's waiting for me, i just need to explore that.... keep on probing things; all i need is to get hold of all the opportunities. It's been good recently, when I am doing something about it; fucking hell....I am here today, i never would've done this even last year... (* i have three interviews with P&G! and if I don't make it after what I've been through.... then screw them!! p.s. I loveee u!!! P&G ppl). . I will get there eventually... just need to active..... my destiny is waiting for me, whatever it is.
(*listening to Eruption - One Way ticket to the moon(!!!!!)) But then time has always been good to me, even when I havent cared about the future; I've always ended in a good situation; just act on when I feel like it.... thats it. Things will come to me... But why i am writing all this bullshit?!!!!!... (*grooving with the tune!!) *this might be a good jive ppl!! :D
(*listening... nooooooooo..... Green Day- Time of your life) hehe.... memories... a lot of memories.... the ppl i met over the last 1-2 years.... damn.. this is the part of life that will affect whole of it... the ppl that i have met, will be most probably know them for the rest of my life... hehe... and ppl usually change you......and these bastards may influence my personal goals... lol........ i still love u i-met-this-last-year ppl!!
(*listening to Himesh -Jhalak Dikhlaa Jaa (remix)) excuse me!!! jives coming!!!
dammit Indian songs are in my head!!! someone please get them out.... these things are addictive..... what next.. movies?!! dramas?!!! arghhh!!!!!
(* listening to Vital Signs - Maula!) Back to wherever i was... or not back to it.. something else..... arghh.... jo bheee.
Ok, I think i was looking towards the future.... I'm not doing bad, am I?? where I am, it's been good. I should be optimistic, look for avenues..... myself... get off my lazy bum... and lets pray for the best....
(*listening to Oasis - Bittersweet Symphony) yes i wouldve been in much better positions if i only worked... if only done that extra bit of work...... if I had my priorities in place back then... i couldve made an effort to convince others....
(*listening to Oasis - Wonderwall) But then, i do have people to take care of me..... I have ppl there which i can rely on..... whatever happens to me, I'll have support for sure...
(*listening to REM- losing my religion) But why the support, what the hell!!!........ and whats the point of all this shit I'm writing in the public .... am i really following shadows in my life...... what am I doing? But then... I have to say these things, but then is it a complaining, whining side of me, looking for a avenue to complain about nothing... i dont know.... i seriously dont.... maybe i read this later... and may find some answers for myself. dammit I hate reflection!
(*listening to Scissor Sisters - Take your mama out) but then.. yes... i must speak... even if its random stuff.... it may..it may make sense.... on some level....i will go through this for hours... i know, i would be. This is a strange time in my life: i must reflect!!
(*listening to Steppenwolf - Born to Be wild!) Yes..... born to be wild.... im keeping my engines running! Boy! have some passion in whatever you do, you'll find ur way!
(*listening to U2- hellalujiah!) its not a time to worry...... let the things come to me.. Enjoy whats in my way!!!
(*listening to Vital Signs - Aitebaar) lets the things take their time.....
(*listening to Call - Jilawattan)... but then.... if i'm content with everything that there is..... why i don't feel right.... like there's something missing.... something important..... Being me! I would love to get away from my head, i am content being away from these thoughts... I wanna be in a happy place... where I'm numb!! but I'm not... I want out of this!!!
(*listening to Junoon - Saeen) scary thoughts..... very scary thoughts....... do i need spirituality... or more importantly am i becoming spiritiual?!
(*listening to Call- Sab Bhula Keh) do i need to be scared of being spiritual..... I know things that have come to me had done me good.... maybe its good? why worry about it.... chilll.... relaaaaaax.
----break---- another two interviews (3 hours in total) later!------
(*listening to Depeche Mode - The pain I'm used to) I am even more depressed: The interviews made me look into myself more; and i have no answers. I have no front to present to them, given that I am not sure myself!!!! reflection is verrrrrry depressing!!!
(*listening to ACDC - she shook me all night long) Maybe its not my time. maybe i am looking for the meaning for my life.... ".... knocking me out with those American thighs".... maybe i need a role model.... maybe.... just maybe..... i need something or someone to go crazy on.... maybe
dammit!!! "... my mind is aching!!"
(*listening to ABBA - Dancing Queen) - i'm back to normal!!
:)
things ABBA does to you
It is the result of a lot soul searching.... a soul searching session which was not planned.. it was more of a mood...
I dont know where to start this. I've been feeling strange stuff these days; in a strange mood... nothing seems normal..... I have deadlines, yet i feel no guilt wasting away three days hogging away and staring at TV..... There's responsibility, yet theres these thoughts of letting go! What's up with me?!!!
where am I? what am i gonna do? what are my plans? what I want to do with my life?!?!
what is the purpose of my life.
I know I am not making any sense..... well, thats exactly the case!!!
My mood is more or less representative of the songs that I have in my MP3 player right now (yes yes... stupid iPod ppl, i have only 128 mb!! screw u!!! :) )
this blog entry was written over a span of few hours.. not in one complete sitting
(*listening to Coldplay-Yellow) I do know that there is something that's waiting for me, i just need to explore that.... keep on probing things; all i need is to get hold of all the opportunities. It's been good recently, when I am doing something about it; fucking hell....I am here today, i never would've done this even last year... (* i have three interviews with P&G! and if I don't make it after what I've been through.... then screw them!! p.s. I loveee u!!! P&G ppl). . I will get there eventually... just need to active..... my destiny is waiting for me, whatever it is.
(*listening to Eruption - One Way ticket to the moon(!!!!!)) But then time has always been good to me, even when I havent cared about the future; I've always ended in a good situation; just act on when I feel like it.... thats it. Things will come to me... But why i am writing all this bullshit?!!!!!... (*grooving with the tune!!) *this might be a good jive ppl!! :D
(*listening... nooooooooo..... Green Day- Time of your life) hehe.... memories... a lot of memories.... the ppl i met over the last 1-2 years.... damn.. this is the part of life that will affect whole of it... the ppl that i have met, will be most probably know them for the rest of my life... hehe... and ppl usually change you......and these bastards may influence my personal goals... lol........ i still love u i-met-this-last-year ppl!!
(*listening to Himesh -Jhalak Dikhlaa Jaa (remix)) excuse me!!! jives coming!!!
dammit Indian songs are in my head!!! someone please get them out.... these things are addictive..... what next.. movies?!! dramas?!!! arghhh!!!!!
(* listening to Vital Signs - Maula!) Back to wherever i was... or not back to it.. something else..... arghh.... jo bheee.
Ok, I think i was looking towards the future.... I'm not doing bad, am I?? where I am, it's been good. I should be optimistic, look for avenues..... myself... get off my lazy bum... and lets pray for the best....
(*listening to Oasis - Bittersweet Symphony) yes i wouldve been in much better positions if i only worked... if only done that extra bit of work...... if I had my priorities in place back then... i couldve made an effort to convince others....
(*listening to Oasis - Wonderwall) But then, i do have people to take care of me..... I have ppl there which i can rely on..... whatever happens to me, I'll have support for sure...
(*listening to REM- losing my religion) But why the support, what the hell!!!........ and whats the point of all this shit I'm writing in the public .... am i really following shadows in my life...... what am I doing? But then... I have to say these things, but then is it a complaining, whining side of me, looking for a avenue to complain about nothing... i dont know.... i seriously dont.... maybe i read this later... and may find some answers for myself. dammit I hate reflection!
(*listening to Scissor Sisters - Take your mama out) but then.. yes... i must speak... even if its random stuff.... it may..it may make sense.... on some level....i will go through this for hours... i know, i would be. This is a strange time in my life: i must reflect!!
(*listening to Steppenwolf - Born to Be wild!) Yes..... born to be wild.... im keeping my engines running! Boy! have some passion in whatever you do, you'll find ur way!
(*listening to U2- hellalujiah!) its not a time to worry...... let the things come to me.. Enjoy whats in my way!!!
(*listening to Vital Signs - Aitebaar) lets the things take their time.....
(*listening to Call - Jilawattan)... but then.... if i'm content with everything that there is..... why i don't feel right.... like there's something missing.... something important..... Being me! I would love to get away from my head, i am content being away from these thoughts... I wanna be in a happy place... where I'm numb!! but I'm not... I want out of this!!!
(*listening to Junoon - Saeen) scary thoughts..... very scary thoughts....... do i need spirituality... or more importantly am i becoming spiritiual?!
(*listening to Call- Sab Bhula Keh) do i need to be scared of being spiritual..... I know things that have come to me had done me good.... maybe its good? why worry about it.... chilll.... relaaaaaax.
----break---- another two interviews (3 hours in total) later!------
(*listening to Depeche Mode - The pain I'm used to) I am even more depressed: The interviews made me look into myself more; and i have no answers. I have no front to present to them, given that I am not sure myself!!!! reflection is verrrrrry depressing!!!
(*listening to ACDC - she shook me all night long) Maybe its not my time. maybe i am looking for the meaning for my life.... ".... knocking me out with those American thighs".... maybe i need a role model.... maybe.... just maybe..... i need something or someone to go crazy on.... maybe
dammit!!! "... my mind is aching!!"
(*listening to ABBA - Dancing Queen) - i'm back to normal!!
:)
things ABBA does to you
'Tis okay...shit happens ! and move on ! Nice selection of songs though :)
Posted by ~ ToOLsTer ~ | 5:42 PM