What I usually think! ... or do I?

This morning, I had one of those Eureka moments. I got one of the most innovative ideas that will make our world a better place, and give us more freedom and choice than we never had before.

We hear about all the problems that have been created because of geographical characteristics of different countries. So what’s the solution? Just move the countries! I’m not kidding, just move the countries.

For the brevity’s (and my laziness') sakes I would keep it to a minimum, throwing out many interesting aspects of the plan. I would just give the crux of the plan.

I give a case study of, Northern Ireland. I reckon Great Britain has a threshold of how far Northern Ireland should be from it, in order to be feasible to keep it in the UK. I reckon that outside the circle it would actually be nuisance for GB to keep NI in the UK, where transport costs would outweigh national pride.


So what must Ireland do to reclaim, Northern Ireland (Assuming war is a no-no!)??! MOVE!! Just take out the whole Island to somewhere else, and let the Protestants rot or find their own way home.

We would come to the issue of HOW do we move, but the most important question is, WHERE? Now these are the feasible options that Ireland has.



Option 1, Northern Europe: Still in EU, but freaking freezing cold weather all year long.
Option 2, North America: Would be discounted easily, as it is not only America's strange neighbour, but also Canada's strange neighbour. And THAT would be bad!!!!
Option 3, Africa Region: Even less chance of qualifying for the Football World Cup


So HOW do we do it? Ok, because of the limited intellectual powers of the author, the methodology would only work for the Islands for now, and by now I mean in 10 years when we hopefully have the technology to carry out this. To start out, we would use 8 earth cutting laser beams (can be bought from any Bond villain), and place them strategically around the island. They will start cutting down through the continental shelf (if that is what it’s called), so that the land mass is disconnected from the base. Now trillions and trillions of nano-robots/machine would be injected below the cut, and they would attach themselves to the base of the disconnected island. This would not only provide some distance between the base and the land mass that has been cut, but also would add buoyancy to the land mass. Then we would take out the biggest sail ever seen in the history of man. THEN WE SAIL!

BRILLIANT AIN'T IT??

Imagine all of the countries who want to be in a better strategic position. Australia is a huge wasteland, and is rightfully ignored in each and every matter. This would certainly make them to move. This illustration shows where they would love to move.



Now that they have blocked the opening of the Red Sea, They would need to dig a canal, which would dissect the country from the centre; and that’s good. Being in a tropical area, the whole country would be in a party zone 365 days a year! They will be in control of all the traffic that goes from the west (through the Suez Canal) to Far East. There are some possible problems though.

1. All of us brown people would smuggle ourselves into there, and make it another one of our colonies :P
2. Proximity to the Middle East would make it the next possible hotbed for Al-Qaeda, given the vast emptiness it has!
3. Australia would even win the Cricket's Asia Cup
4. New Zealand would have no one to hate, and would eventually die off.
5. Maldives would be eaten alive